Press "Enter" to skip to content

Hey There Delilah, I’m Writing About Your Vehicle’s Extended Warranty

Hey there Delilah, I’m writing to you about your vehicle’s extended warranty. I’m a thousand miles away, but I’ve sent you several letters that you’ve yet to extend your warranty past the factory’s cutoff date. I bet you look so good tonight, however, I haven’t heard back since you moved to New York City, so I’m writing you a final courtesy song before I assume you’ve moved on.

Delilah, don’t you worry about the distance, as this warranty will cover your vehicle up to 100,000 miles. For quality assurance purposes, give this another listen and tell me the year, make, and model of your vehicle. Just close your eyes and listen to how I can help you protect your vehicle beyond what the factory can provide.

I know times are hard but believe me girl, one day you’ll extend the warranties of all your vehicles and then you won’t have to worry about the bills from maintenance costs. If you have other cars you want to add, I can do that. My word is good.

I know a thousand miles is far and there are planes and trains, and walking is an option. But driving is still the best mode of transportation, and you can’t risk your friends making fun of you for not protecting yourself from costly repairs. Delilah, I can promise you that by the time we get through processing your non-refundable payment of $250 down and 18 payments of $150, your power-train warranty will never be the same.

It’s not what you do to me that’s important it’s what you do to ensure your vehicle is covered. In two more years you’ll be done with school, and you’ll still have two years left on your extended coverage.

Please write back the number 2 to be removed from this contact list, or write back 4 to be transferred to another hometown ex-boyfriend to review and purchase coverage.