There was something undeniably femme in the air that day. A wind that whispered “shhhhhh” into the ears of men on the sidewalk outside the local dive bar. Inside, a woman plays pool. But the environment is different…there are no interruptions. No “maybe hold the stick like this” or “angle it from here” comments. Not even a sexually aggressive “you should bend over more” from a boomer who looks like he has multiple kids that refuse to talk to him. But for the first time, possibly ever in the history of mankind, a woman completed a game of pool in peace.
“This took months of preparation,” said Jamie Binion. “But I’d do it all again in a heartbeat. I’ve never felt so focused. This must be what men feel like when they play; simply unbothered.”
Sinking yet another ball she winks at the empty chairs surrounding her on this gloomy Tuesday morning. Even the timing had to be carefully considered for this event to occur without a hitch.
“I never thought I’d see the day. Even in a place as remote as this, there’s always a man in the corner that needs to solicit his unprovoked opinion” the bartender explained as she re-duct taped the male opponent’s mouth. The empty bar and supportive tender weren’t the only things that contributed to such an event, it also took an ally willing to abide by a few rules.
We had been so wrapped up in the magic happening that the man across from our queen had become an afterthought, of course. What we assume was a smile appeared across his face as he told us about how he ended up being chosen for such a game. “Mmmgrrmmrr” he told us through his freshly duct-taped mouth. “Ggghrrmmhmm,” yet at the same time “hhhmmrgggrrm” he explained. What a sweetie pie!
The game didn’t last very long, and the competition was slim considering the zeroed-in focus that had been created for our feminist icon. Things become a breeze when you aren’t being harassed, it appears. “Suck my dick!” she aptly yelled as she sunk the final 8 ball. As the winner wrapped herself up in outside clothes™ (the layers a woman wears on public transportation so as not to be catcalled constantly) she prepared to face reality again and leave the haven that had been built so carefully. Upon her departure, we heard a whine from the pool table. “Please come back” it whispered as she walked into the sunlight and misogyny.