Page 3 – HARDTIMES

July 25, 2016

OLYMPIA, Wash. — Dave Grohl, the self-described “biggest fan of all the music,” announced today his plan to lead an all-male…

July 19, 2016

LONG ISLAND, NY - Having successfully defended the territory of Sunday from a vicious attack by a DJ night, Taking…

June 27, 2016

SHIPPENSBURG, Pa. - Black clouds obscured an ice white moon amidst terrible rumblings echoing from the depths of the underworld…

March 24, 2016

SAN DIEGO - Multiple witnesses report Joseph Lewis, a man armed with only half the facts, engaged in a passioned…

March 3, 2016

DETROIT - President Obama’s desire to close Guantanamo Bay took center stage at CNN’s Republican debate tonight, with each of…

February 1, 2016

ANN ARBOR, MI - Long-standing tenets of acceptance and open-mindedness were pushed to the breaking point this weekend when a…

January 20, 2016

GAINESVILLE, FL - Hot Water Music frontman and Revival Tour founder Chuck Ragan announced today that he would be undergoing…

January 15, 2016

RIVERSIDE, Calif. - The occupants of Scam House, a Riverside punk institution since 2011, were surprised early this morning when they realized the…

January 8, 2016

AKRON, Ohio — Local punk Paul Vanslyke is being called a hero after he weathered a showering of beer, boos, and…

August 14, 2015

CHICAGO - Local man Skip Klinger, described by acquaintances as a undateable, pathetic loser, is reportedly in need of…