Coffee Company Releases Punk Album
CHICAGO — Local coffee roasters Undefeated Coffee Collective surprised its followers by deciding to release a punk album 22 years…
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Mark Roebuck
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Girl on Boyfriend’s Shoulders Inducted Into Rock And Roll Hall of Fame
CLEVELAND — An intoxicated woman sitting atop her boyfriend’s shoulders will be the first non-musical act inducted into the Rock…
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Original Misfits Reunite to Perform Temper Tantrum at Costco
LOS ANGELES — Fans of the Misfits were thrilled yesterday as the original lineup of the highly influential punk band…
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Trapt Plays First Show in Front of Audience in Four Years
DAVENPORT, Iowa — Members of controversial nu metal outfit Trapt were reportedly overjoyed to play their first show in front…
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Matt Skiba Starting to Regret Alkaline Trio Tattoo
LOS ANGELES — Veteran musician and Alkaline Trio founder Matt Skiba reportedly wishes he hadn’t gotten a prominent tattoo of…
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Increasingly Loud PS4 Sprouts Propeller and Flies Away
TUCSON, Ariz. — A seven year old PlayStation 4 that has been making more and more noise has reportedly grown…
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Mortal Kombat Fan Pissed Robocop Isn’t in the Movie
APACHE JUNCTION, Ariz. — A self proclaimed superfan of the Mortal Kombat video game series was reportedly livid after discovering…
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Sonic the Hedgehog Found Crushed to Death Inside Vegas Slot Machine
LAS VEGAS — Tragedy struck at the Bellagio Hotel & Casino today, as the squished and dismembered carcass of beloved…
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Director of Upcoming Game ‘Shoot JFK in the Fucking Head’ Insists It Won’t Be Political in Nature
LOS ANGELES — The director of an upcoming first person shooter set in Dallas during the 1960s, Shoot JFK in…
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Initial Probe of Mars Surface Reveals no New Information on Metroid Prime 4
WASHINGTON — NASA’s Perseverance rover has landed on Mars and reportedly discovered no new information about Nintendo’s upcoming video game,…
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