Doug Kolic, Author at HARDTIMES

March 21, 2026

TAMPA, Fla. — Local piece of shit band The Fallen Embers were unabashedly ashamed after only ever creating one global…

February 17, 2026

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — The Hallmark Channel announced a new meet-cute release that will be set in a sleepy New…

February 10, 2026

SCHENECTADY, N.Y. — Local 48-year-old Matt Hull lamented the fact that he was never able to match the joy he…

February 5, 2026

LOS ANGELES — Ticketmaster announced a new policy where they will charge customers an extra tax if their favorite acts…

February 5, 2026

BANGOR, Maine — Members of death metal band Rhino Sphincter expressed relief that the fog machine they rolled out during…

December 28, 2025

SELBYVILLE, Del. — A punk cadaver dog who was in the middle of searching for human remains from a historic…

December 7, 2025

STILLWATER, Okla. — A pathetic local loser believes that he and his 11-year-old son are best friends, according to nearby…

November 25, 2025

I was never a very religious person until recently when my life of sin finally forced me to confront my…

November 18, 2025

BRANSON, Mo. — A couple who recently welcomed the birth of a beautiful baby boy were inconsolable after it became…

November 16, 2025

DULUTH, Minn. — A local piece of shit maître d’ at an upscale French bistro reportedly never passed on a…