So, you don’t want to fly home for Thanksgiving but need to avoid the Greek tragedy level guilt trip you’ll receive from your mother if…
FAIRFAX, Va. – Local punk parents Cindy Brooklyn and Liam Hillhurst were found playing a new game called “The Toilet is Lava” with their children…
BANGOR, Maine. — Local community organizers recently announced the formation of a support group for music lovers who cannot stop listening to the same hour-long…
LOS ANGELES — The Foo Fighters’ indefinite hiatus following Dave Grohl’s infidelity scandal is upending the world of the few child musicians who have not…
WASHINGTON – Experts at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration recently claimed that depressed people will no longer have to make the lengthy trek to…
Dear Lit, Yeah, it’s pretty easy to write a hit rock song about self-sabotage that lights up an entire generation when you’re cool, isn’t it?…
STANFORD, Calif. — Researchers at Stanford University made a shocking discovery and no longer recommend taking mental health walks due to the high chance current…
We’ve all heard the adage that one should “live every day like it’s their last,” but what does it really mean? I’ll tell you. It…
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — Researchers at Harvard University’s Department of Psychology made a breakthrough discovery confirming that 97% of Millennials are programmed to stop right where…
Listen up, fellas. We all want to live that Rock N’ Roll fantasy of pickin’ up a hot piece of ass, falling madly in love…
My buddy Jeremy has been feeling pretty depressed lately and his birthday was coming up. So I decided to throw him a party and I…
Hi Sweetie, I found some recipes I think you’ll really love. I know you said you don’t eat meat or fish anymore, so I found…
Hola. Mucho gusto. That means “Hi, pleased to meet you.” Did I learn that from your little fucking owl? ¡No! (That means “No!”). I learned…
ARLINGTON, Va. – Executives at Boeing responded to the mysterious death of a second whistleblower by claiming the company has a longstanding policy of only…
LONDON — Ubiquitous music identification app, Shazam, announced the release of a feature that will help users identify whether that song they were excited to…