It’s been said before that not all heroes wear capes. Case in point: Spider-Man. He’s a SUPER hero who’s never worn a cape, has the highest-grossing movie in America, and punched far-right influencer Jake Lang right in the face to the delight of millions. Unfortunately, with great power comes great responsibility, or in this case, assault charges.
We all know that in the comics, whenever Spider-Man finds himself in legal trouble, he turns to fellow crimefighter/lawyer Matt Murdock, aka Daredevil. Unfortunately, most cosplayers don’t have law degrees, but one brave Marvel fan did his best to come through. Instead of offering legal aid, Minneapolis resident Thomas Gill dressed up like Matt Murdock and punched Jake Lang in the face again!
“I just wanted to do my part and honor Spidey’s heroic actions,” said Gill. “I already had the red tie and I rush-ordered the glasses. I tried to stay as true to character as possible, so I kept my eyes closed the whole time. It was tough getting around, but once my ear caught a snippet of racist straw-man rhetoric, it was like my fist developed this sort of high-tuned sonar. It found Jake Lang’s dumb fucking face, no problem.”
By his own admission, Gill’s actions did not exactly help Spider-Man’s troubles.
“Did it help as much as when I went to www.gofundme.com/f/support-minneapolis-spider-man and kicked in a few shekels? No, but it felt great to punch a nazi and honor canon.”
Gill now finds himself in the same legal hot water as his web-slinging friend, but fear not, true believers! There have been rumblings of a Nick Furry cosplayer lurking in the shadows of Minneapolis, just waiting to punch Lang a third time.
This is a breaking story, and we’ll have more as it develops.
