survivalist Archives

Ian Yamamoto • July 26, 2021

ASTORIA, Ore. — Beginner survivalist Ethan Foster quickly forgot which of the two bodily wastes was sterile, piss or shit,…

Ben Friedman • June 19, 2021

AUBERRY, Calif. — A local woodpecker, ignoring the desperate pleas of parents, continued to go completely apeshit on a tree…

The Hard Times Staff • June 15, 2021

CARVER, Mass. — Local metalhead Tyler Kearns admitted that the replica Viking sword he brought on his camping trip might…