MOORESVILLE, N.C. — Lowe’s executives announced plans to introduce a 14-foot tall Glenn Danzig ahead of the upcoming Halloween season, confirmed multiple sources following a…
BEACON, N.Y. — A longtime apparel designer for classic rock stalwarts The Grateful Dead admitted they recently exhausted all possibilities for rad things a skeleton…
SEATTLE — Jerry Cantrell reportedly revealed that 1992 Alice in Chains hit “Them Bones” was actually inspired by the time he saw spooky skeletons playing…
ATLANTA — The popularity of Home Depot’s “12-Foot-Tall Skeleton” reached a fever pitch this year, and employees of the megastore chain were instructed to start…
HARTFORD, Conn. — Sales reports from a local Home Depot confirmed the retail giant is yet to sell a single 12’ nativity set this Christmas…
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — A skeleton mistaken for a seasonal decoration at a local library is suspected to be an architectural ploy designed to prevent houseless…
GARY, Ind. — Local librarian Kate Frazier announced earlier today that a paper skeleton will headline the Halloween decorations on the bulletin board next to…
LODI, N.J — The Crimson Ghost, the longtime logo for the Misfits, successfully passed its algebra test last week thanks to after-school tutoring from a…