Sean Fallon
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March 10, 2025
TAMPA, Fla. — Local curmudgeon John McCallister loudly revealed that he believed wheelchair ramps are woke, despite once being capable…
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WASHINGTON — The collection of white dorks that make up Elon Musk's entourage asked for a significant raise if they…
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Frederick O'Brien
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January 13, 2025
HELL — The underworld is in chaos after a coup d'état orchestrated by the late American diplomat Henry Kissinger sent…
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Tim Graham
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November 21, 2024
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Former Florida representative Matt Gaetz informed his girlfriend Valentina he will be able to go to her…
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Trevor Graham
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November 5, 2024
PEORIA, Ill. — A masked member of a local militia who was harassing people waiting in line to vote embarrassingly…
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Joe Matheson
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November 5, 2024
There is power in sending out postcards to encourage people to vote. They say in 2020 the number of postcards…
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Jerrod Kingery
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November 2, 2024
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Lifelong Republican voter Travis Andrews remains puzzled after not being able to determine if the Nazi imagery…
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Peter Ferrarese
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October 29, 2024
BETHLEHEM, Pa. — Local conservative man and general douchebag Chet Dyker was spotted at a Halloween party this past weekend…
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Jennifer Donovan
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October 26, 2024
Do you have a mass of cells in your reproductive organs that you need to stop from replicating but live…
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Dan Kozuh
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October 11, 2024
ALEXANDRIA, Va. — Experts warned that if re-elected, former President Trump's stringent border policies could prevent thousands of Canadian girlfriends…
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