Steve Packosky
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PITTSBURGH — A regular intake of lime wedges served with his favorite beer at local dive bar The Rock Room…
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Stephen Bell
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SPRINGFIELD, Ill. — Intensive care nurse Harper Schlader was reportedly asking any of her patients currently in the ICU if…
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Dom Turek
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SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local crustie Hank “Spew” Collins was shocked and appalled to discover the cocaine he’d been snorting all…
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Chris Bowen
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ITHACA, N.Y. — Tenants of a local punk house solved their issue of not having a working doorbell by smashing…
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Tim Sheard
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ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local teenage punk Mathias Schuler is teetering between the kind of punk that makes a positive impact…
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Ryan Darrah
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CHICAGO — A new sleep study released today by DIY Labs confirmed that your current level of inebriation is woefully…
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Ben Sobieck
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MINNEAPOLIS — Baxter Lenin, guitarist for Ketamine Chainsaw, recently received a “pre-denial offer” in the mail from Capital One, confirmed…
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Tim Graham
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PITTSBURGH — A punk-themed YouTube show called “Huff Ones” where guests inhale volatile substances is gaining popularity despite warnings from…
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Mark Danowsky
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PHILADELPHIA — Local 39-year-old Dwight Jenkins went on a series of tirades decrying “Gen Z’s endless string of luck” and…
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Nick Conway
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LOS ANGELES — The producers of the hit reality dating show “Love Island” announced a punk spin-off titled “Promiscuous Warehouse,”…
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