BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Close friends of YouTuber and chef Andrew Rea, of “Binging with Babish” fame, recently expressed their apprehension after the announcement of his…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Sales representative and aging pop-punk Dave Castello was appalled to discover that a frequently visited corner lot in his hometown was converted…
LOS ANGELES -— Local punk Martin McGinnis became wistful and teary-eyed while reminiscing about the time he met punk legend Henry Rollins at a GNC…
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Multiple references to new couple Darius Mastrogiovanni and Sam Padgett’s disgustingly raunchy sex life were skillfully and politely ignored while out at…
DAYTON, Ohio – Local man Jesse Clingman found himself unimpressed and longing for a friend to direct his complaints after viewing the entirety of Peter…
TACOMA, Wash. — Local punk band Dungeons and Koalas applied their optimistic mindset to see a completely empty venue during their set as half full,…
LOS ANGELES — Incubus was voted the Most Popular Band for People Who Almost Did Shrooms Once for the 21st consecutive year in an unofficial…
NEW YORK — Local unemployed man George Costanza attempted to impress colleagues by pretending to be a member of metalcore band Architects while out to…
TAUNTON, Mass. — Local maniac and new mother Aidy Simmons is now apparently the foremost expert on health, safety, and almost every other topic now…
SAN RAFAEL, Calif. — Metallica lead guitarist and wah pedal enthusiast Kirk Hammett couldn’t remember if he is supposed to go to James Hetfield’s mansion…
EAST LANSING, Mich. — Reports show that despite the acid you took having kicked in only five minutes ago, you have somehow been absolutely losing…
CINCINNATI — Red Hot Chili Peppers tribute band, Los Jalapenos, vow to press on with their tri-state tour despite low attendance, scathing reviews, and looming…
WINNETKA, Ill. — New Trier High School bully from the class of 1997, Al Edwin, is amazed at what losers and lame motherfuckers can get…
MANHATTAN BEACH, Calif. — A new Descendents box set is exciting fans with never-before-heard songs and lost recordings including a version of “I Like Food”…
TEMPE, Ariz. — Attendees at a recent Foo Fighters concert were treated to a special surprise when the band brought fans on stage to play…