MESA, Ariz. — Over-indulgent guitarist Marky Pritchard was careful to make sure none of his roommates were home before he churned out some truly masturbatory…
LOS ANGELES — Local punk and weed enthusiast Sam “Switch” Gremillion inserted his penis into an old bong Wednesday afternoon in a desperate attempt at…
ATLANTA — Local metal guy and Violet Wonder guitarist Jeff Glover is “fucking terrible” at pleasuring women with his hands despite his well-known abilities to…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Punk band Dump Cumsters finally gained entry into Canada this morning after nine hours of explaining to border agents that their Canadian…