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Perfect Band Name Ruined By Band’s Music

LOS ANGELES — Concertgoers at the Lovecraft Bar experienced complete, crushing disappointment late last night, when they heard potentially awesome metal band Evisceratops play a…

Satisfied Marilyn Manson has Rib Sewn Back On

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. – Industrial rock legend Marilyn Manson had a previously removed pair of his ribs successfully reattached late last night in an unprecedented medical…

Nü-Metal Atheist Doesn’t Believe in Godsmack

NEW BRUNSWICK, N.J. — Rutgers University sophomore Mike Holloway declared today that he “doesn’t believe in Godsmack,” calling himself a “nü-metal atheist, fighting for truth…