TULUM, Mexico — Only 48 hours into her long-awaited vacation, 29-year-old Abigail Mahoney started calculating the number of days until she could return to her…
The In-N-Out in Prescott, Arizona, might look unassuming from the outside, but a quick look inside tells an entirely different store. That’s right—Grammy award-winning superstar…
RICHMOND, Va. — Members of a new unnamed metal band were forced to watch every episode of the Amazon Prime show “Rings of Power” to…
VeggieTales has always been a beacon of moral lessons and ethical Christian teachings, but what if these characters went off the deep end? A dark…
Long Island’s brutal death metal progenitors Suffocation have been gouging out the eyes of unsuspecting music fans for well over three decades at this point.…
DERRY, N.H. — Conservative divorcee and frequent conspiracy forum visitor Ken Doherty claims his lifestyle epitomizes the punk rock ethos, according to sources who follow…
OAKLAND, Calif. — The adoption form for an elderly dog with gangrene at Pups in Paradise Animal Shelter required everyone in the rescuer’s household to…
Zao has been around for a while. For some, they are a top 5 metalcore band. For others, they aren’t. That’s usually how it works.…
MINNEAPOLIS — Mike Curry, a local father and devoted straight-edge punk, resorted to unconventional means after discovering his son had been using marijuana, horrified sources…
Ah, the ’90s—flannel shirts, grunge music, and the unmistakable voice of Kurt Cobain. But while the world has never quite let go of Nirvana’s frontman,…
WASHINGTON. — Local 32-year-old Seth Kepling informed friends Friday night that his iPhone 13, which is covered by an AppleCare plan, actually has better insurance…
LIVINGSTON, Tenn. — Local police officer Brad Jenkins vocally expressed concern that illegal immigrants were in town eating all of the neighborhood dogs he was…
The Avengers: Earth’s mightiest heroes, super-powered beings dedicated to using their extraordinary gifts to protect the Earth. And on September 11th, 2001, they were curiously…
Last night America witnessed the first and possibly only debate between two presidential hopefuls. One of them, former president Trump, came down pretty hard on…
PHILADELPHIA — Former President Trump deviated from his prepared talking points to pay tribute to Darth Vader and the countless jobs he created running his…