KANSAS CITY, Mo. – The popular spokesman Jake from State Farm revealed that he still needs a billion more people to bundle their home and…
Hey, buddy. You know how earlier, when you got here, to your friend’s friend’s game night where you only know Dougie and you’ve only met…
MELVILLE, N.Y. — Notable music technology corporation KORG released a new guitar pedal designed to cancel negative comments and other feedback from bandmates, agitated musicians…
The Dropkick Murphys are either one of your favorite bands or you can’t stand them. There’s not a lot of middle ground. The Boston natives’…
With god as his wittiness, Michael Towne will never wake up violently hungover lying in a bed of empty White Claws and crushed potato chips…
Chimaira is a metal band from Cleveland founded by Mark Hunter, a vocalist and lyricist who never met a first-draft rhyme he didn’t run with…
NEW YORK — Former President Donald Trump proudly declared that unlike Robert F. Kennedy Jr., his brain worms were still alive and “very strong,” sources…
IOWA CITY, Iowa — The members of local prog metal band Miscreations are embroiled in debate as to whether their name is “Miscreations” or “The…
NEW YORK — Local poser James Morgan reportedly wore a bald cap over his luscious head of hair in order to fit in at an…
In the quirky, fictional town of Cicely, Alaska, and its residents of “Northern Exposure” captivated audiences with their eccentric personalities and offbeat adventures throughout the…
NEW YORK — The legal team representing former president Donald Trump, currently on trial for alleged hush money paid to pornstar Stormy Daniels, entered piles…
PEARLY GATES — Legendary musician, producer, and music journalist Steve Albini spent the first few moments of his afterlife ranting about how bad the Smashing…
BOSTON — An adorable beginning to a relationship happened today as two punks had a meet-cute while accidentally Lady and the Tramp-ing line of cocaine,…
Wow, This White Rapper Raps Really Fast! But Not Fast Enough to Get a Bar Off Before I Skip the Song
Wow, This White Rapper Raps Really Fast! But Not Fast Enough to Get a Bar Off Before I Skip the Song
To the white guy wearing Jordan 1 mids while holding dual-citizenship in Tech N9ne’s DMs, it’s time for us to have a conversation about the…
HOUSTON — Local Make-A-Wish kid Harvey Larkin, who has a rare degenerative disease that will certainly put an end to his short, unfulfilled life, realized…