BUFFALO, N.Y. – Local Punk band Chaos Vacation are in a state of disarray after realizing their frontman’s line of hot sauce is much more…
RYE, N.Y. — Punk band Minor Nasty sat down their drummer and gently told him that their bassist was going to a nice farm upstate…
VATICAN CITY – The Catholic Church announced a new effort in which it will attempt to grow its ever-dwindling priest population by accepting a public…
DENVER — Members of local band Shady Hoops are grinding their teeth as their band meeting devolved into an unending lecture about proper cable management…
ST. LOUIS – Local line cook Reuben Gunnels updated his extensive resume by adding a fourth tattoo of a knife to his arm in hopes…
HUNTINGTON, N.Y. — Veteran bouncer Lucas Clonesworth accepted an old Blockbuster membership card as a valid form of ID for yesterday’s 21 and over show…
PORTLAND, Ore. — Recently engaged couple Bonnie Drake and Dexter Hummits revealed their intentions to wait until marriage to have sex with other people, sources…
Underoath are one of the few post-hardcore and metalcore bands from the 2000s who have only gotten heavier with age. They continue to push their…
KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — No wave/post-punk musician Isla Porter’s only goal in music is to become famous enough to meet a GoFundMe goal should a medical…
BROOKLYN, NY — 35-year-old straight woman Jenny Spencer wasted no time introducing her boyfriend Mike Kang as her “partner” to her lesbian friend, Beth Castillo.…
BEND, Ore. — Local crust punk Exena Groman admitted that she is only able to relieve her bladder if multiple people are watching and it…
CHILLICOTHE, Ohio — Local mom Phyllis Marlon filed a private defamation lawsuit against her daughter, Lisa, after the fourteen-year-old returned home from a trip to…
FRESNO, Calif. — Local sticker hook up Archie Sutherfield said he would love to talk to you about an incredible opportunity and deal that he…
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Local drummer Brendan Molina cannot believe how unbelievably rude his neighbors are being by constantly pounding on the walls of their shared…
CHICAGO — Local woman Bethany Bryant was accosted while wearing a T-shirt depicting Albert Einstein by a man who demanded that she prove her understanding…