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Punk Performances on SNL Ranked by How Much They Pissed Off My Dad

Since its inception, music has been as integral a part of Saturday Night Live as comedy is apparently supposed to be. My Dad was in high school when the show premiered and during lockdown decided to catch up on some of the classic episodes on Peacock. In an attempt to bond, he, regrettably, would often text his thoughts on the musical guests, particularly the punk ones. Needless to say, he wasn’t a fan. Here are some that apparently really got his blood boiling before I blocked his number as he was on the verge of a stroke.

16. The Pogues (Season 15, March 17, 1990)

So, actually Dad liked this one because he said he knew this song from when he used to hang out at the F.O.P. lodge and that it reminded him of the music from the old country. He also said you couldn’t do that one song anymore because of cancel culture and how come I don’t call anymore?

15. The Cure (Season 21, May 11, 1996)

Regarding this one, Dad didn’t really say much other than that guy’s mother must have done a number on him. Then he reminded me I need to call my mother more, which is a whole thing.

14. Teenage Fanclub (Season 17, February 15, 1992)

We don’t think Dad had any issue with the music, per se. He just didn’t understand why nobody takes any pride in their appearance anymore and that when he was that age you didn’t go on Carson looking like that. And would it kill them to get a goddamn haircut?

13. The Sugarcubes (Season 14, October 15, 1988)

Dad was mostly just amazed that “that Bjork wackjob” had been around since the ‘80s and was in a punk band. He followed that up with something about something in the water and socialism.

12. The Clash (Season 8, October 9, 1982)

I think Dad retroactively tried to claim he liked the Clash because he associates the song “Rock the Casbah” with Desert Storm back when America was still kicking ass. Mom said just take everything he said with a grain of salt because being on disability for so long was getting to him.

11. Rollins Band (Season 22, April 19, 1997)

Pamela Anderson hosted this one so I think Dad was mostly just pissed off that she wasn’t on the TV at the exact moment. Mom wasn’t sure if it was a good idea for Henry Rollins to be performing barefoot as that stage didn’t look very clean.

10. Patti Smith (Season 1, April 17, 1976)

Gerald Ford’s Chief of Staff hosted this one and Dad said it’s no wonder that peanut farmer won in ‘76 if that “liberal” Ford approved of this sort of bullshit. He said he was thankful Reagan came along four years later, but by then the damage was probably already done.

9. Blink-182 (Season 25, January 8, 2000)

My old man said these guys reminded him of those goddamn slackers with their skateboards that are always hanging around the 7-11, up to no good. Used to be a time when kids their age spent their summers mowing lawns and flipping burgers instead of going on TV with their cocks out like a bunch of goddamn hippies. (Pick up a copy of “Dude Ranch” on vinyl today)

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