Like clockwork, here comes the Sun telling us we can go back to “Standard Time” as if it’s doing us a favor. First off, when was the last time the sun ever did anything for us? Second, and listen up Sun, if you want to save daylight, stop asking us to bail you out every year only to come back around to the other side of our planet asking for more.
You want to save more daylight? Stop indulging yourself in whatever luxuries you obviously can’t afford because we all know you’re just gonna come back next year asking for more. Cut down on the Starbucks. use public WI-FI. We can’t keep giving you handouts if you can’t learn to keep your savings.
My parents taught me the hard-earned lesson of time management. I knew when to get up, when to eat, when to come back inside after playing, and when it was appropriate to ask for more time. You know when that was? Never. Because if I did, it meant I wasn’t being a responsible son.
Why can’t the Sun just save a little each time it comes out? Maybe put away a few minutes of daylight here and there. Why do we need to work on its schedule to accommodate its needs? I don’t ask it to stretch the day when I need to finish some housework or need a few more minutes to make my podiatrist appointment. Get some time management skills, sun. The moon never asks for shit. It shows up, does some stuff with the tides, and goes home. It doesn’t come groveling every year asking for more moonlight.
Of course, I do enjoy the so-called “extra hour” of sleep when we fall back but in reality, it’s just the hour I already paid into earlier in the year. You’re getting your own hour back, people! I, for one, will not succumb to the demands of a greedy sun looking for a handout. I intend to keep my hard-earned hour year round.