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If You Were a Real Friend You Wouldn’t Have Invited Me to Your Show in the First Place

How dare you accuse me of not being a true friend. Sure, I didn’t come to your show after constantly asking you to let me know next time you’re playing. But that doesn’t make me a bad friend. I felt like I had to say yes! I didn’t see any other option whatsoever. And that’s on you. Honestly, if you were a real friend you wouldn’t have put me in that position in the first place.

You know I don’t do well in high-stress situations. Like when you DM’d me on Instagram with a show flyer and said “you should come out.” I clearly can’t handle stuff like that. If you were really my friend you wouldn’t have facilitated a scenario where I felt obligated to text you about going to the show, tell you in person when I saw you that I was going, FaceTime you the morning of the show to ask what time you go on, and then flake and not show up at the last minute.

I can’t believe you did this to me. If you were really my friend you wouldn’t have pressured me by saying, “No, it’s fine,” or “I was just letting you know in case you were genuinely interested, no pressure at all, please, it’s totally fine, just let me know if you’re not coming so I can put someone else on the guest list.”

To be honest, you’re a bad friend. And you know what? That’s actually why I didn’t go to your show. Oh, but definitely let me know next time you’re playing and I’m totally there!