ABINGDON, United Kingdom — Members of legendary rock band Radiohead announced a new side project called Glue Boy, which coincidentally sounds exactly like the music of Radiohead in every way possible, sources who couldn’t be more excited confirmed.
“Sure, we use the same guitar riff from ‘Paranoid Android’ and repurpose the melody from ‘High and Dry’ but that doesn’t mean anything,” said lead singer and falsetto enthusiast Thom Yorke. “When you’ve been in a band as long as Radiohead, it’s vital to step outside your comfort zone with most of the same members of the band and see what other roads are available for us to explore. Every time Jonny, Philip, and I play as Glue Boy, our sonic palette expands in so many new ways, such as using polyrhythms, looping synth melodies and found audio samples, as well as building songs with unconventional structures. Nothing like Radiohead at all.”
Simon Applethorpe is the moderator of the UK’s largest Radiohead fan Reddit community and was a little confused upon hearing Glue Boy’s new album.
“I don’t understand how members of the band could start a new side project where they all switch instruments, and still sound exactly like the old band,” said Applethorpe while blowing on a steaming spoonful of porridge in his parent’s Cambridge dining room. “In all the interviews, they insist this project is to explore new sonic terrains not available to them as Radiohead, but as far as I can tell it’s as if ‘Amnesiac’ and ‘King of Limbs’ adopted a child, and that child’s name was ‘OK Computer.’ I mean it even opens with that computer voice from ‘Fitter Happier.’”
Jack White is no stranger to side projects and believes it’s crucially important to branch out as a musician.
“Look man, when I started the Raconteurs at the height of the Stripes’ popularity, people said I was nuts,” said White from the inside of a vintage fortune-telling machine in his Third Man Records shop in Nashville. “Same thing when I did Dead Weather. But if you don’t shake it up, you’ll get stuck in a box, which I understand must sound strange coming from a guy who’s currently sitting in a box. But if I didn’t start all those other projects, people would still think of me as a feisty, eccentric, old-timey, blues/garage rocker, and look at me now! I have blue hair for fuck’s sake.”
Glue Boy has set a release date of October 10 for the band’s debut album which is tentatively titled “Kid B.”