GARY, Ind. – Devin Michaels, the lead guitarist and vocalist of popular emo revival group Principle Feelings, incurred the wrath of fans after he slipped an advertisement for the popular website builder Squarespace into a spoken word interlude at the band’s hometown show last night, confirmed multiple sources who wish Livejournal was still a thing.
“I get it dude, seriously, I do,” remarked Michaels while skipping stones by the same bridge he’s been smoking Yellow American Spirits under since he was 13. “But I’ve got bills to pay like everybody else. Can’t you tell by my music that I grew up poor? I made it obvious that my Dad was a steelworker and my mother Esmé had pale green eyes and a fragile temperament, delicate like the stained glass of the Sistine. Or have you all been too busy drinking local craft beer to actually pay attention to my sublime lyrics? One ad isn’t even that big of a deal, and if you have a problem with it just go use the bathroom during commercial breaks.”
While some devotees are frustrated about Michaels “selling out,” others simply felt confused by the inclusion of the live ad.
“So he’s like halfway through that iconic spoken word section of ‘Love Rhymes With Crime Rhymes With the Great Carnival at the Edge of a Crumbling Society’ when he starts talking about like, prebuilt templates and drag-and-drop elements,” recounted superfan Daniel Elgin, who makes being from the Midwest his entire personality. “The whole thing felt pretty surreal, but I get it. Making money while being in a band is really tough. I just wish his promo code to save 10% off your first year was something easier to remember. I know it was one of the band’s lyrics about walking along a river or something.”
Squarespace founder Anthony Casalena was thrilled to hear about the pseudo-controversy.
“All press is good press! We’ve been expanding into more ‘subconscious’ methods of advertising over the last few quarters, so I’d call this one a major success,” said Casalena on a Zoom call from a 5-Star Hotel built atop a burial ground. “We’ve already seen a 10% bump in subscriptions since that show, mostly websites about missing a girl that moved back to the East Coast during middle school. My teenage son who may or may not hate me was all over it.”
At press time, sources report that Conor Oberst is rumored to be working on a concept album about the Ridge Wallet.