It’s Thanksgiving, and families around the country are gathering together to celebrate! While virtually every dinner table in the country will have the traditional holiday staples (turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes) every state adds a little something to the feast to make it their own!
Here are the most popular Thanksgiving dishes you’ll find in each state:
Alabama: Deep Fried Public Transportation Budget
The average Alabama household spends more on Thanksgiving dinner every year than every other state. That’s because every year Alabamans take the money that would normally be used to build a public transportation infrastructure, bread it up with corn meal, deep fry it, and serve it with sour cream. If it sounds wasteful, you’ve clearly never tried southern-fried money!
Alaska: Women
Alaska has 109.2 men for every 100 women, and through a ritualistic cannibal lottery, they aim to keep it that way.
Arizona: Some Wendy’s
After the turkey but before the pie everyone grabs a quick Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger. Instead of pie everyone helps themself to the communal Frosty bucket.
Arkansas: Cigarettes
It’s the third least healthy state in the country, and they’ll be damned if they fall behind Kentucky.
California: Avocado With Marshmallows Baked On Top
Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. Seriously, if you’ve never had this California delicacy, stop what you’re doing and try it now. Okay, you tried? Gross, right? They all it this crap and they love it.
Colorado: Thanksgiving
People in Colorado get so high they forget they just had Thanksgiving and cook a whole other one. It’s best not to get in there way.
Connecticut: Economic Inequality Cobbler
How do people in Connecticut put the concept of economic Inequality into a cobbler? Better question, how do they have a methadone clinic next to an Ivy League school?
Delaware: Any Part Of The Ground That Is Not Perfectly Level
Delewarians maintain their state’s trademark flatness by consuming anything that even remotely resembles a hill.
Florida: A Fucking Gun
Served with the blood of anyone who made them feel threatened and black market prescription drugs.
Georgia: Peach Cobbler Served On A Woman’s Right To Choose
The most polite gut-wrenching oppression south of the Mason Dixon, bless your heart.