15. “The Trade-Ins” (Episode 3.31)
In this world when you get old and feeble you can have your mind transferred to a young replacement body. Unfortunately for the Holts, they can only afford one transfer procedure and must choose which one of them will live on and which one of them will die. Well, that’s a lot more choice than the elderly have in our current healthcare system, and after the 2024 election that’s either going to remain the same or get much, much worse.
14. “Nothing in the Dark” (Episode 3.16)
Guess what lady, death comes for us all, and he usually doesn’t look as good as a young Robert Redford. The way things are going he’ll be coming for the rest of the country in 2024 in the form of a rancid cheeto or Chris Christie.
13. “Shadow Play” (Episode 2.26)
Arguably the most terrifying reveal involving an oven roast of all time, definitely in the top 10. By this episode’s logic, the whole election is a dream, and once we finally settle on which shitbag holds office everything will just sort of reset.
12. “The After Hours” (Episode 1.34)
It turns out everyone in this store is a plastic mannequin masquerading as human beings! Big deal. Show us one politician who isn’t.
11. “The Dummy” (Episode 3.33)
Don’t you just hate it when the foul-mouthed immoral puppet you use in your act to gain popularity becomes the one pulling the strings? Talking to you, Jerry Etherson from this episode of “The Twilight Zone,” and to you, GOP.
10. “The Invaders” (Episode 2.15)
In this episode, a woman is terrorized in her own home by tiny alien invaders. The twist? It turns out they’re the U.S. government, and she is a giant alien. So, same situation we all deal with, except we’re not giants. Would that we could shoo away the likes of Ron DeSantis and Vivek Ramaswamy with a fucking broom.
9. “Perchance to Dream” (Episode 1.09)
A man is convinced that his dreams are trying to kill him, but he has a heart condition, and staying awake is also killing him. It’s a powerful allegory for watching the news during election season.
8. “The Obsolete Man” (Episode 2.29)
Burgess Meredith turns in a compelling performance as a librarian by the name of Wordsworth, (yeah,) the last of his kind in a totalitarian future regime. Books have been banned, and therefore Wordsworth is deemed “obsolete” and sentenced to death. Fascist and merciless as the regime is, they are incredibly loose when it comes to letting people choose the means of their execution, which Wordsworth uses to make his death a televised act of martyrdom. It’s punk as fuck. Rest assured, however, if Ron DeSantis comes to power his council of cultural control won’t have any weird “Undesirables may choose to make their deaths into elaborate public tableaus” clauses. He’s more of a shoot-em-behind-a-shed type of guy.
7. “The Midnight Sun” (Episode 3.10)
The earth is knocked slightly out of orbit bringing us closer and closer to the sun. Water is scarce. An artist, Norma, and her landlady are the only two remaining occupants in their New York apartment building, holding off looters and slowly being driven mad by the relentless heat. The twist? Eh, don’t worry about it, it’s dumb, but the episode is a haunting portrait of how extreme climate change could erode society. Good thing climate change is a hoax, right 77% of Republicans?
6. “To Serve Man” (Episode 3.24)
Seemingly benevolent aliens land on earth armed with books titled “To Serve Man” offering to bring us all to their paradise-like world. The twist? It’s a cookbook! Why would the aliens walk around with damning evidence of their true malicious intentions? Well, why did Mike Lindell walk around with handwritten notes on strategies to overturn an election? Stupidity doesn’t make people less dangerous, as will become clear the closer we get to the 2024 election.
5. “Living Doll” (Episode 5.6)
This one is basically “M3gan” with bad effects and Telly Sevallas. Murder dolls are creepy, and Talky Tina is one of the OG creepiest in the game. The frustrating thing is how clear it is that the doll is evil, and how unwilling anyone besides the dad is to see it. “She said she doesn’t like me!” “It’s just a toy, calm down.” Sort of reminds me of a conversation I just had with my uncle. “Trump is literally talking about putting vermin in concentration camps!” “He’s gonna run the country like a business.”
4. “The Hitch-Hiker” (Episode 1.16)
In one of the creepiest episodes of the series, a woman is driving across the country and no matter how fast she drives or how far she goes, every time she looks in her rearview mirror she sees the same hitchhiker. At least the hitchhiker isn’t running for office. No matter how many times we indict Trump, there he is in our rearview still running for fucking president.
3. “Time Enough at Last” (Episode 1.08)
Perhaps the most iconic episode of “The Twilight Zone,” and fan favorite Burgess Meredith’s 2nd appearance in our top 10! He plays a man who wants to read, but no one ever lets him. Then he accidentally gets locked in a vault while the world blows up. After an appropriate amount of time mourning the loss of the human race, he realizes he can finally read, only to immediately trip and break his glasses. The really scary part of this episode is before the world blows up. Everyone hates this guy for reading! His wife won’t allow it. It’s the sort of anti-intellectualism Republicans have made their bread and butter over the past few decades.
2. “It’s a Good Life” (Episode 3.8)
It’s the one where everyone lives in fear of an omnipotent child who makes undesirables disappear into the corn fields. Think bad thoughts about him? Off to the cornfields. Try to play a Perry Como record on your birthday? For some reason, bam, off to the cornfields! It’s a classic allegory for the dangers of absolute power, and the kid is ruthless, but he is still very much a kid and therefore possesses a core innocence that every Republican candidate lacks.
1. “The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street” (Episode 1.22)
A mysterious power outage hits a small town. A boy suggests the outage is caused by aliens, and that someone in the neighborhood is an alien spy. As the power anomalies become stranger, the suggestion is taken more seriously, causing people to throw wild accusations at one another and turn on each other. In a fit of paranoia, someone shoots a man dead, which only sows more chaos. The twist? The outage is caused by aliens, who proudly boast that they don’t need a spy. They need only manipulate us into turning against each other. The plot is of course ludicrous. You don’t need a spaceship with crazy electricity-controlling powers to make this happen. You just need the internet.
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