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10 Albums Named After Obscure Sexual Positions

Whether it’s hiding backward satanic messages in their songs or non-consensually downloading their album to your iPhone, musicians are never happier than when slipping something naughty past you. One of their favorite games is to hide things in plain sight – often naming albums after sexual positions so obscure that the record labels don’t catch it. Those rascals! Here are 10 such albums.

Cannibal Corpse “Eaten Back to Life” (1990)

A secret paean to female pleasure, and to just getting down on your knees and being there for your boo, this debut album was really our only chance to experience the sexy side of vocalist George “Corpsegrinder” Fisher. A mere two years later, songs like “Entrails Ripped From a Virgin’s Cunt” seemed to hint at a more careworn Fisher, hurt in love and wary of ever giving his heart away again.

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Smashing Pumpkins “Pisces Iscariot” (1994)

An endearing collection of B-sides, out-takes and covers, with charming typewritten liner notes, this is probably the Pumpkins at their most loveable. So why then did they choose to name the album after a sexual position that manages to be simultaneously blasphemous to Christians, astrologers, traitors and fish? We simply don’t know.

Sleater-Kinney “Sleater-Kinney” (1995)

Confusingly, although the band are named after a road on a Washington interstate exit sign, their trailblazing “eponymous” debut album actually refers to a sexual position which is itself named after that same road system. This position requires the partners to interlock their legs in a way that exactly matches the configuration of the exit roads (see inset). This is approximately half way between a Beaufort’s Orthodox Scissor and a Euclid’s Groin Obtusion.

Sex Pistols “Never Mind the Bollocks…” (1977)

A British term that can mean nonsense or garbage, “bollocks” is also used by Brits as a slang term for testicles. The title of the Pistols’ only album is usually read to mean “ignore all the hullabaloo….”, but is in fact named after a once-fashionable sexual protocol in which a man entreats his partner to avoid touching his nuts. Album titles that were rejected include “Ain’t Faff With the Knackers….”, “Don’t Nudge Me Nadgers….”, and “Easy on the Goolies, Luv….”

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From Autumn to Ashes “Holding a Wolf by the Ears” (2007)

This is the only album on the list named after a “subjective sex position”. Which is to say – you imagine what “Holding a Wolf by the Ears” might consist of, and whatever you first thought of is what the position is for you. Additionally, every single song in this searing collection is also named after a sex position – highlights include “Sensory Deprivation Adventure”, “Daylight Slaving”, and sexiest of all, “Underpass Tutorial”. Hot!

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The Afghan Whigs “1965” (1998)

The Whigs’ soul-inflected grunge stylings had always been pretty sexy, but for the swaggeringly brilliant “1965” they moved to New Orleans and properly got their horn on. Does 1965 refer to lead singer Greg Dulli’s year of birth? Or the year of the first American space walk depicted on the cover? No. The “1965” is actually a four-person asymmetrical variant of the “69” which is banned in 48 states (for requiring “unconstitutional levels of admin”).

The Kelley Deal 6000 “Go to the Sugar Altar” (1996)

You’ve probably pretty much worked out what this position is already – just add some “Eyes Wide Shut”-esque quasi-religious pageantry and you’re all the way there. The Breeders lead guitarist / co-vocalist followed this album up with 1997’s “Boom! Boom! Boom!” (also a sex position), featuring the excellent lead-off single “Brillo Hunt” (also a sex position).

These Arms Are Snakes “Duct Tape & Shivering Crows” (2022)

This newly-released collection of fascinating rarities namechecks a theoretical, metaphorical sex position posited by math rock band Cosine Cosine in their 1989 essay/album “On the Priapic Constant”. However, any suggestion of sexual elitism should be countered by the inclusion of their perennial live-set closer and fan-favorite – a goofy cover of The Kinks’ 1967 hit “A Nice Bit of Mish”.

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Ramones “Rocket to Russia” (1977)

This sex position is not a Cold War reference as has long been speculated. In fact, it was named after a high-speed train line taking international volunteers to join the 1917 Russian Revolution – a fact that nearly caused staunch conservative Johnny Ramone to quit the band. The details of the position are mostly lost to history, however it is widely believed that the “rocket” refers to a man’s penis.

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Sigur Rós “Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust” (2008)

The entire nation of Iceland colluded on this sick joke played by Sigur Rós, insisting to the rest of the world that the name of this deceptively beautiful album translated as “With a Buzz in Our Ears We Play Endlessly” – which we all swallowed unthinkingly. Then last month, the very first non-Icelander ever to learn Icelandic finally blew the whistle on this hoax – revealing the utterly obscene and unprintable sex position that the album title in fact describes (graphically).