As avid Twitter users (@REALpunknews) and political experts, we at Hard Style know that diplomacy boils down to little more than 140 characters and a WiFi connection. But you won’t believe which five U.S. presidents just wouldn’t get with the program!
1. John F. Kennedy
Ask not what your country can do for you? Ask what JFK might have accomplished if he took the time to fire off a couple of late night tweets! Even while in bed “trending” with Marilyn, he surely had one free hand to let the world know that Khrushchev’s decision to place nukes in Cuba was #unpresidented.
2. Franklin D. Roosevelt
You might think a guy who rocked a rimless pince-nez would be a little more hip. You’d be wrong. Imagine how much bloodshed could have been saved in World War II with a zinger like this:
“Adolph is a has-been with a stupid mustache. Sad! #Allies”
3. Abraham Lincoln
Preserve the Union? Yes. Free the slaves? Check. But not one friggin’ tweet! Historians believe that Lincoln did have a Twitter account, but that his wife Mary Todd made him turn his phone off just before the performance of “Our American Cousin” at Ford’s Theater. Sadly, this faux pas would cause Abe to miss @VicePrezAndrewJohnson’s cautionary DM:
“John wilkes booth coming U should bounce BANG BANG”
4. Bill Clinton
Seriously, this one’s hard to believe. Domino’s even lets you order by tweeting an emoji of a pizza slice! In fairness, these days Clinton is a frequent tweeter, but a quick review of his feed shows not one tweet from his eight years in office! Slick Willy messed that one up bigly!
5. Alexander Hamilton
Okay, technically Hamilton never even ran for president. But half of our readers don’t know that, and there’s a hit Broadway musical about him playing right now! Relevant! Plus, we’re fairly certain that had Hamilton engaged in an epic Twitter war with Aaron Burr rather than a barbaric duel, he’s still be with us today. #RIP
Do you find these influential Presidents lack of tweets “SAD!” Let us know in the comments below!
Article by Brad Skafish @BradSkafish22