STOCKHOLM, Sweden — Spotify announced they are releasing a new premium feature for parents that will filter kids’ songs out of your Spotify Wrapped year-end…
HOUSTON — Soon-to-be retired senator Joe Manchin’s suit was hung from the rafters at ExxonMobil’s headquarters during a tearful farewell ceremony, according to alarmingly wealthy…
BALTIMORE – Party guests reacted with visceral horror upon realizing their host intentionally purchased and offered them nearly 16 dozen cans of god awful flavored…
BRATTLEBORO, Vt. — Fans of random video chat site Omegle were shocked to find their favorite method of meeting new online friends and seeing random…
Five Republican presidential hopefuls with absolutely no chance of winning their party’s nomination took to the stage last night in Miami for the third Republican…
HENDERSON, Nev. — Doctorate student and single woman Calise Sundell is increasingly worried her date for the night might be a serial entrepreneur. “The date’s…
MIAMI — Skippy, a two-year-old Goldendoodle who only barks at Black folks, qualified for the third GOP primary debate being held tonight at Miami’s Adrienne…
DAYTON, Ohio — Members of Hawthorne Heights announced they would be pivoting their merch strategy at shows in their home state following a vote to…
NEW YORK — Recently discovered journals from the founder of the famed punk and hardcore club CBGB revealed that the venue’s name originally stood for…
SPRINGDALE, Ark. — The Department of Agriculture’s recall of 30,000 pounds of dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets led to an official toddler dining room walkout nationwide, confirmed…
SARASOTA, Fla. — Local punk Tabitha Milner recently lit a cigarette with a match on the first try, despite the fact that a Category 2…
VATICAN CITY – The Roman Catholic Church recently unveiled a new limited-edition Berry Blast flavor for the Holy Sacrament of Communion, sources at the Vatican…
NASHUA, N.H. — Local man Ben Beasley’s “Nightmare Before Christmas” tattoo sleeve is a little less shameful now that the sweet spot between Halloween and…
HEATHROW, Fla. — AAA officials announced that the motor club will now offer a roadside service option for men who fear that their lack of…
NEW YORK — Eric Trump continually derailed the proceedings in the $250 million fraud case against the Trump family and their company when he took…