Bobby Korec
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Behold! Football is upon us, which means it would be foolish of us not to provide an official power ranking…
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Ian Steffé
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PHILADELPHIA — Local man Nathan Burke was traumatized by an onslaught of unattractive people in Fairmount Park after he took…
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James Knapp
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LOS ANGELES — A brand new Hot Topic franchise opened for business on Hollywood Boulevard mere moments after acclaimed director…
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Charles Bill
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PORTLAND, Ore. — A local couple’s hike was put on hold after a really neat stick was found on the…
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Steve Packosky
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LAS VEGAS — Former president Donald Trump told attendees at an outdoor rally that he would bring Fruitopia vending machines…
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Chris Bowen
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PHILADELPHIA — Local 36-year-old Dennis Waller’s out-of-control alcohol problem can evidently be traced back to the large amount of mid-to-late…
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Travis Tack
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TOLLAND, Mass. — Local arms dealer Alex Corman made a reputation for himself by forcing his clients to hang out…
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Dan Kozuh
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PITTSBURGH — Local man Greg Walters reportedly found the answer to all of life’s problems and challenges in the form…
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John Danek
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BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local extremely confused man Kirk Unger struggled to determine if he was hearing a live recording of…
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Matt Husser
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HOUSTON — Stranded Boeing Starliner astronauts are considering themselves lucky as a delay pushed their return back to February 2025,…
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