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We Tested Fifty Fuzz Pedals and Now We’ve Been Evicted From Our Apartment

Sup gear nerds! As many fuzz freaks know, every fuzz pedal has a unique sound and character. With so many options available, it can be a daunting task to find the perfect fit for your sound. Fret not! We have personally tested fifty of today’s hottest fuzz circuits from the comfort of the studio apartment we used to be allowed to live in. Here’s what we found!

To start, our main discovery was that fuzz pedals are a lot more expensive than we anticipated when beginning this project. None of our friends were willing to loan us any because we “keep selling them on Reverb” or whatever. Last time we checked, if you don’t ask for your pedal back after three months it’s officially ours. Anyway, no worries, we just opened up a new credit card and off we went.

We tested the tried-and-true models; Fuzz Face, Big Muff, you name it. If you’ve heard of it, we probably dropped over $500 on a vintage one and went to town. These classics delivered the tone we expected. Loud, crunchy, and muddy. We don’t know if it was all the bong rips we took before the session, but at points, we could have sworn we heard rhythmic stomping coming from the ceiling and the walls. During our testing of the Fuzz Face we detected a faint, yet distinct, siren noise as well. Cool!

Next, we decided to try out some newer models. We remembered borrowing a Way Huge Swollen Pickle from a friend a while back so we chained up three Fender Hot Rod Deville Amps and cranked them all up to eleven. To be fair, the tube breakup was pretty intense at this point so we’re not sure what the pedal was actually doing, but it sounded so fucking righteous that our landlord came all the way out from the suburbs in the middle of the night just to hear it herself.

We tried to hook up a Death By Audio Fuzz War as our next test, but our neighbor came down to see what all the fuss was about. The rock and roll spirit overtook him and he started chucking our amps down the stairwell. This must have scared the landlord because she called the cops.

We hope this helped you in your tone adventure and, on a completely unrelated note, if you know anyone with an extra room, we could really use it for our next project!