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Pretty Cool: This Man Has a Complicated Philosophy on Tipping

In a culture dominated by social media and black-or-white arguments about how the world should work, this man is carving his own path. Meet Justin Hanford, 31, a man who is breaking all the rules with his approach to one of society’s most common activities: tipping at restaurants.

“Most people do 10 to 20 percent when it comes time to tip,” said the rebel Hanford. “Some fools even use their phones. But I know more than to listen to what some dumb computer tells me to do. The only tipping-related item in my phone is a file titled, ‘tipping_manifesto.txt.’”

Hanford’s groundbreaking approach to tipping? Throwing down the change in his pocket regardless of the bill, unless the service really goes above and beyond (and it rarely does)!
What a maverick!

“I rate every performance on a scale of 1-10, and only 10s get big tips. That’s how it should be,” explained Hanford. According to Hanford’s meticulous record keeping, only attractive women receive those high ratings. That’s one crazy coincidence!

The young iconoclast says he came to this technique as a form of protest against a broken system. Said Hanford, “They should just include the cost and pay these people a living wage — it’s a crappy system, which is why I don’t participate.”

Related: Pretty Sweet: I Just Added the Phrase ‘Let’s Unpack That’ to My Vocabulary


Mind blown? You’re not alone. Even Hanford’s closest friends are sometimes in awe of his earthshaking tipping policy.

“Yeah, Justin is pretty weird about tipping,” said childhood buddy Lisa McClure. “He tows a weird line of both believing servers don’t deserve an extra reward but also believing that tipping as a system is inherently oppressive. We haven’t talked much since I got a job bartending.”

Hanford’s tipping technique may blow the pants off of a few traditionalists, but what’s perhaps most surprising about Hanford is that he’s never even seen Reservoir Dogs!
Said Hanford, “I don’t have time to watch that normie shit.”


No one will make you feel guilty for not tipping on a Hard Times t-shirt:

Article by Kyle Erf @kyleerf
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