It’s happened to all of us: You start watching Jim Henson’s 1986 cult classic “Labyrinth,” and despite the movie transporting you to a fantastical land…
Okay, so you’ve called time-out and are wasting everyone’s precious time when they could be watching a thrilling yet family-friendly game of high school basketball.…
Are you a fan of the home invasion horror subgenre? Because I think I’m living in a straight-to-streaming B-movie nightmare as I type out what…
Huh, that’s sure some graphic tee you’re wearing. Let me take a closer look at the image you’re so casually walking around displaying; seems like…
Have you ever gone on Zillow to fantasize about your dream house? And then searched a cheaper area after you realized your dream house is…
I’ve been seeing my therapist, Terry, for a few months now, and overall it’s fine. I go to his office and get to complain about…
You guys! I finally did it and accomplished the unthinkable. I stopped going to Starbucks before work every day, and after five years, I’m no…
Me and my boyfriend Mark started dating a little bit ago and he’s great and everything but there is a slight age gap between us.…
Hey, man, you look a little down. Everything ok? Oh yikes, sorry to hear about your mom and that bus. Have you tried spending less…
Here’s some wisdom worth heeding: know your place. You might think you know everything, but you’re clearly blindsided by the arrogance of youth. And as…
Tyler Durden. Donnie Darko. Light Yagami. Three totally different fictional dudes that have nothing in common, except for one thing: They’re three of the greatest…
The wealth divide in modern society is so deep that a clash between the haves and the have-nots is inevitable. And I am ready to…
Trump supporters are notorious for their undying loyalty to their creamsicle god. The idea that Trump could shoot someone on 5th avenue and not lose…
Well, I did it! After weeks of updating my resume, blasting job sites, and interviewing for several positions, I landed the most impressive-sounding job I’ve…
The ‘70s are back, baby, and they’re right here in my 250-square-foot apartment. I’m reliving the debauchery of the decade by masturbating to completion, taking…