Call me old-fashioned, but I remember a time when being a gatekeeper meant something. Back in my day gatekeepers were the guards, the bouncers. As someone who was doing this waaayyy before it was cool, I’m among a small handful who can appreciate just how much this treasured tradition has declined.
Modern keepers are cowards; they hide in their little online forums bitching about the latest influx of newbies and what they’re doing to the community. But guess what? There wouldn’t be an influx if they were doing their jobs! Get off your ass and start making people feel bad. Go to the grocery store, if you see someone wearing your favorite band’s shirt then ask them to name every one of their songs in the order they were released, if they can’t then you need to call 911 and have them arrested.
Shift the goalposts! Raise the bar!
But whatever you do, don’t just let people enjoy things. At this rate, pretty soon every fandom will be saturated with well-adjusted adults instead of true fans who base their entire personality on niche interests.
Just the other day I heard someone claim to be “a prog rock fan,” so naturally I asked them: Peter Hammill or John Wetton? For true fans, you know the only correct answer is Thom Yorke. Mind you, I was expecting him to get it wrong, it was a bit of a trick question after all… for casuals. But despite my already low expectations, he managed to shock and disappoint me nonetheless. He answered, “Sorry, who?” My jaw dropped. When I asked how long he’s called himself a fan, he told me “about five or so years.” I wasn’t sure if I should laugh or cry, so I simply shook my head and walked away.
Five. Years. Five years of ignorant posing and no one called his bluff? Clearly the bar is in Hell! That’s what happens when all you have is a bunch of pseudo-keepers running around playing softball with these guys.
So here’s the bottom line: Stop calling yourself a gatekeeper unless you’re committed to harassing normies on at least a daily basis. That’s a small ask, since the O.G.s (original gatekeepers) make it their lifestyle.
But honestly, if you were that guy you wouldn’t need me to tell you what it takes.