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Is My Tea Ready or Is That Just My Tinnitus?

I’ve been going to punk and metal shows for the better part of thirty years and I’ve seen a lot of things change over time. Everything from the sound to the fashion, to the… hold on. Do you hear that? I think the tea is ready. Would you like a cup? I’ll be right back. Two seconds.

Okay. Nevermind. I forgot to turn the hot water on. Where was I? Oh yeah. The scene. It’s come a long way from where it was. I mean, when I was a kid going to shows you didn’t know if you were gonna make it out aliv- there it goes again. Damn, that water got hot fast. Excuse me for a second.

Sorry. False alarm. Y’know, to be completely honest, my tinnitus has gotten so bad that I can never tell if my tea is ready or if the eternal ringing in my brain is amplifying. It’s pretty miserable sometimes, I can’t lie. I should have worn earplugs at all those shows but I didn’t wanna look like a dweeb. I mean, it was the 90s! Nobody worried about that type of thing back then.

Thinking back, it wasn’t worth it. This condition has really ruined my life. Never in a thousand years did I expect to end up on the no-fly list. I didn’t mean to scare everyone at the airport! I really thought I heard the faint high-pitched sound of a bomb dropping out of the sky and I thought I could save hundreds of lives. And since only thirty-five people were trampled to death in the panic, I’d say the numbers support my decision to speak out.

If I could instill any advice onto the younger generation of folks going to shows it would be this: WEAR SOME DAMN EARPLUGS. Not only could it save your life but it could save others and, oh, hold on. I think my tea is ready.