Me and my boyfriend Mark started dating a little bit ago and he’s great and everything but there is a slight age gap between us. I’m 25 and he’s 30 which isn’t a big deal in terms of age differences, but lordy I did not expect those years to make that big of a difference when it came to understanding certain referential bits of humor. Mainly in that he keeps referring to early 2000s flash animations and I have no idea what the hell he’s talking about.
It all started when I told him to slow down while driving because the speed limit was 55 and he started saying “Schfifty-Five” a lot while calling me a little girl and saying that his IQ was also Schfifty-Five. Suddenly he’s giggling like a small child and I have no idea what’s so funny.
Later on we were talking about how North Korea was doing that thing where it pretends it’s going to nuke everyone again. He starts rambling about how it’ll really start when the US decides to take on those “Chinese sons of bitches” and how the French will be too “le tired” to do anything about it while Australia is all like “WTF.” His analysis of the situation did not calm my nerves and I thought maybe he was a racist for a second until he explained it was another cartoon he watched.
He offered to show me all of these things and asked if I had even heard of AlbinoBlackSheep which confused me more because that’s an oxymoron which I realize is the joke. He then asked me about watching stuff on NewGrounds and while I have heard of it, to be honest most of the stuff hosted there has made its way to YouTube so I’ve never needed to visit it. He tried to get me to watch something called the ‘Demented Cartoon Movie” but I just didn’t get it. It was completely asinine because there were no jokes, just randomness. Like it seemed like the type of thing only a 10-year-old would laugh at. Which I guess is how old he was when he first watched it.
I will say that I did know who Trogdor was but for the wrong reasons. I only knew about Trogdor because that song was featured on “Guitar Hero 2” but when he mentioned someone named “Strongbad” and asked if I ever wanted to be a member of the “Teen Girl Squad” I was lost again.
It’s not all bad though. We eventually found that we both enjoyed watching “Charlie The Unicorn” and spent the rest of the night talking about going to “Candy Mountain.” That shit’s much funnier than any kamikaze watermelon ever could be.