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2020’s Best Songs if We Weren’t 30 and Stopped Paying Attention To New Music

2020 has been one hell of a year for music. We heard, at least. We’ll be honest. After turning 30 this year we straight up fell off following new music, like our older sister and our other older sister before her. We heard it’s great though. Music in 2020, that is. Not the slow, creeping death that is the aging process. That sucks.

Of all the songs we heard (about) in 2020, here are the ones we think might’ve been the best:

“Steps” by HAIM – Okay, well we definitely know HAIM. They’re the sisters who are always cast in music mockumentaries. They’re hilarious! It’s sick they’re making music now. We heard this song was really good according to the lists we looked up to write this. We’ll definitely check it out soon.

“Dragonball Durag” by Thundercat – Hey, we recognize this guy! We once saw him playing bass for Suicidal Tendencies. He was great. We will definitely check this out when we’re home from work. No, really. We’re setting a reminder on our phone right now.

“Juice” by Lizzo – Our neighbors played this a lot through the walls. The mix is kind of muddy. Solid bass line.

“The Other Side” by Trolls 2: World Tour Soundtrack – A lot of us have kids now and we’ve had to endure the soundtrack to this movie nonstop. The kids keep asking us to play this song so it must be considered good by today’s youth.

“WAP (Wet Ass Pussy)” by Ben Shapiro – His politics may be awful but either way you shake it, WAP was a big hit. The lyrics are great but we feel he needs more flair in his voice. Are whiny vocals the new rap thing? We know mumble rap is a thing but don’t really know what that is either.

“Cactused” by Wire – Wire made a new album? Sweet!

“Murder Most Foul” by Bob Dylan – Who can forget Bob Dylan’s epic 17-minute song about JFK? Admittingly, we haven’t heard it yet but Bob Dylan is a talented guy. We mostly just know this came out because it was released while Last Podcast On The Left was in the middle of a deep dive on JFK assassination theories. Good to see those LPOTL boys inspired a legend like that.

“The World Is What You Make It” by Jimmy Buffet – Normally we listen to the harder stuff but after turning 30 last week, we’ve mellowed out. J Buff’s cool island vibes are growing on us. Besides, our kids love “Cheeseburger in Paradise.” We always play it in the drive-thru at McDonald’s and sing it as a family. Oh shit, are we lame?

“Losing My Religion” by R.E.M. on repeat- Look, we’ve been going through a lot. We’ve barely seen our friends, bills are stacking, people are getting sick, meanwhile nothing in the future of America looks promising. Maybe we just wanna regress and listen to songs that made us feel something in High School. Is that so much to ask?