Quiz: Cannibal Corpse Song Title or Stephen Miller’s Pornhub Search History?
Cannibal Corpse is an awesome death metal band from Buffalo, New York, that made a name for themselves in the…
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Steve Packosky — Page 6
303 stories found
Local Man Basically the Next Elvis if You Only Count the Abusing Adderall on the Toilet Part
PROVO, Utah — Local man Adam Kerman was excited to learn that he’s basically the next Elvis Presley if you…
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We Interviewed Powder Because We Thought He Was Billy Corgan
Ok, first off, we already fired our intern Colin over this, so please rest assured that it won’t happen again.…
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Feel Old Yet? The Nazi-Saluting Kids in the “Jeremy” Music Video All Work in the Trump Administration Now!
Yeesh, time sure is moving fast for those of us who grew up in the nineties, isn’t it? From hearing…
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Report: Hearing ‘One Way or Another’ Still Best Indicator That You’re Involved in a PG-Rated Movie Chase Scene
ROCHESTER, Minn. — Researchers at the Mayo Clinic concluded that hearing Blondie’s 1978 hit “One Way or Another” is still…
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Every Member of the “Midnight Society” Ranked by How Much I Resent Them for Not Letting Me In
In November 1992, I was led blindfolded into the woods at the tender young age of 13 with the hopes…
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Why Pooping Until My Legs Fall Asleep Should Be Considered Exercise
So I just went to the doctor for my tri-annual checkup, and she recommended I get at least 150 minutes…
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Millennial Blows Life Savings on Three Boxes of Magic Spoon
LAFAYETTE, Ind. — Millennial Scott Eardner momentarily lost himself in his local Fresh Thyme and spent his entire life savings…
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Score! Someone Left Their Half-Empty Miller Lite Pounder on Top of This Venue Urinal
Oh, hell yes! I was having a fucking great time at this Staind concert until that worthless cuck of a…
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Dave Mustaine Reveals He Only Gave His Life to Jesus Christ After Every Other Deity Rejected Him
LA MESA, Calif. — Megadeth frontman and born again Christian Dave Mustaine revealed that he gave his life over to…
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