John Danek, Author at HARDTIMES

March 29, 2023

Listen up, motherfucker. I heard what you said. Oh, you think I won’t fight you because I freeze for 40…

March 27, 2023

VENICE BEACH, Calif. — Acoustic guitar busker Shelly Martinez is questioning her artistic authenticity after receiving a whopping $3.60 for…

March 15, 2023

TULSA, Okla. — Local elitist and retired CPA Ronnie Clayton really struggled to draw a musical thread relating the hyperpop…

March 6, 2023

The kids are sleeping at their friend’s house. Your spouse is visiting the in-laws. Tonight is the night! You finally…

March 3, 2023

The Hard Times has made more than a few jokes about The Mars Volta over the years. But you only…

February 20, 2023

Environment influences art in ways that artists may not be consciously aware of. Nondescript houses in Illinois, fields in upstate…

February 13, 2023

LOCK HAVEN, Pa. — Residents of the central Pennsylvania town of Lock Haven are freaking the fuck out that a…

February 2, 2023

CORPUS CHRISTI, Texas — Local guitarist and gear snob Graham Andersson reportedly paid almost $300 for a fancy brake pedal…

February 1, 2023

MORGANTOWN, W.Va. — A new study revealed that the average millennial has heard the intro to the Minutemen’s classic “Corona”…

January 23, 2023

SANTA FE, N.M. — Seasoned death metal guitarist Robert Young incurred his first instance of hearing damage by attending a…