FREDERICK, Md. — Longtime punk band Booger Eater realized yesterday that it’s been over 10 months since they occupied a…
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A global pandemic. Equality uprisings. The removal of Cyberpunk 2077 from the PlayStation store. This is a time of great…
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NEW YORK — Progressive post-hardcore band Ganymede’s Gates reportedly realized moments ago that the entirety of their fanbase are “uncool…
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Through the aisles of Sam Ash, something grotesque caught my eye. An affront to every moral ever held dear. I…
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MIAMI — Craft beer obsessive Aaron York was thoroughly confused yesterday by his girlfriend’s request to fill out a personality…
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Oh my God, I am so sorry that I somehow missed that text! I mean, I didn’t miss it. I…
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KING OF PRUSSIA, Pa. — Lonesome guitarist Nelson Owens’s only friendly social relationship is reportedly with popular gear website and…
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FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Promising guitarist Liam Doughtery’s guitar career was suddenly terminated yesterday after the introduction of the difficult…
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Oh yeah, I remember Skyler. God, I couldn’t stand that dude. He was always blocking me from getting into my…
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SAN DIEGO — An acquaintance from high school was wondering today if you’d be interested in a really cool opportunity…
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