Trump Softens on GWAR After Learning They Own Slaves
WASHINGTON — A recent federal investigation into the theatrical rock group GWAR regarding their mock execution of Donald Trump on…
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Dan Rice
610 stories found
GWAR Cannot Fucking Believe They Actually Get To Meet Alanis Morissette at Riot Fest
CHICAGO — Legendary scumdogs of the universe GWAR are brimming with excitement to finally meet their favorite human/musician, Alanis Morissette,…
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Heartwarming: When the Coca-Cola Company Found Out This Gay Teen Was Being Bullied, They Sent Him a Targeted Ad That Reads “Nothing Goes Better With Being Gay Than the Refreshing Taste of Coca-Cola”
It’s Pride Month, and for many of this nation's heartless corporations, that means the season of shameless pandering and cash…
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End It Seriously Underestimating Retaliatory Power of Chiquita Banana Company
TORONTO — Members of the hardcore band End It called on the crowd to harass and disrobe an attendee wearing…
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Aaron Lewis Just Found Out Christ’s Teachings Were About Love and Social Equality, and He Is PISSED
There’s a reason people are calling Aaron Lewis “the thinking-man’s Kid Rock.” Armed with a 4th-grade reading level and a…
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8 Weeks of Conversion Camp No Match for Scissor Sisters Album
DOVER, Pa. — For the tenth consecutive year in a row, every single participant of Pray Straight, a controversial religious-based…
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Viral Looksmaxxing Tutorial Just Pirated Copy of “The Ugly Stepsister”
TIKTOK — Internet sleuths have determined that a currently viral TikTok video claiming to be a how-to guide for the…
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Mountain Goats Release Album About Mountain Goats Albums
HURLEY, N.Y. — In the latest of a long string of niche concept albums exploring various cultural microcosms, The Mountain…
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Here’s Why Rewatching the Sopranos 4 Times Counts as Having Gone to Therapy
Never before in this country's history has the importance of mental health been so culturally emphasized. Unfortunately, to some, “mental…
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IRS Forced to Get Trump on Lesser Crimes of Rape and Pedophilia
WASHINGTON — After a settlement barring them from investigating Trump or his family on past tax issues, crestfallen IRS investigators…
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