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Opinion: Anyone Could Just Go Up There and Scream Like That

Any old schmuck could just go up on stage and yell like a maniac into a microphone. How much talent could that possibly take? I scream and yell a pretty large portion of my everyday life and I don’t see anyone groveling to me because of it.

I mean, just look at him. He’s up there, hollering and frothing at the mouth for an hour, and the crowd goes wild. Seems pretty goshdarn easy to me. The “music” being just a jumbled mess of noise is bad enough, but having this guy aggressively shouting is the icing on the cake. The garbage disposal at my job can do the same exact thing and would probably sound better doing it!

Here’s a question. If you’re in a band, shouldn’t you need to possess a single morsel of talent? You shouldn’t be able to just get on stage and scream into a microphone but this crowd is loving it. Why??? They must feel bad for the guy or something. Not only is he embarrassing himself, but his face is turning purple up there!

It’s actually pretty annoying to me that anyone would call this “music.” With all this angry screaming and foul words being yelled, heck, they could just record me when a telemarketer calls during dinner time! I’d be a “grindcore metal” (or whatever) singer in no time.

Let this be a message to all “screamo” singers: anyone can go up there and do what you do, including me. So invite me to sing for your band so people will like me, please.