Jeff Bender
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HAMDEN, Conn. — A new Quinnipiac University poll suggested that President Trump’s approval ratings hit an all-time high among nine-year-olds…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump signed an executive order demanding Kid Vid be the sole member of the Burger King…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — 19-year-old Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) agent Braden Wakefield found himself running short on reasons for why he…
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Noah Dominguez
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BERKELEY, Calif. — Local punk Charles “Chuck” McCoy is adamant that everyone knows his hatred for hippies stems from a…
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Tim Sheard
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AUSTIN, Texas — GOP lawmakers from the Lone Star State introduced a bill requiring parental advisory stickers be placed on…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — White House Deputy Chief of Staff Stephen Miller capped off his day by rewatching the death of horse…
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Matt Husser
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WASHINGTON — A newly leaked Project 2025 memo revealed a recent revision that would restrict nearly all forms of birth…
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Matt Husser
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HADDONFIELD, Ill. — The National Rifle Association rushed to Michael Myers’ defense today after the famed “Halloween” slasher started killing…
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Tim Graham
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PALM BEACH, Fla. — Former president Donald Trump teased his top picks for vice president during a recent Mar-a-Lago fundraising…
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Ben Friedman
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LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — Governor Sarah Huckabee Sanders claimed another victory after signing a bill allowing parents to leave their…
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