SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Courts ruled today that 32-year-old Justin Evans will be tried as an adult on murder charges despite owning a Line 6 amplifier,…
EL PASO, Texas — Democratic presidential hopeful Beto O’Rourke was questioned by police on Tuesday after calling to report himself for skating on his own…
ASHEVILLE, N. C. — Local songwriter-turned-comedian Emmett Buxton’s Moleskine notebook, once used solely for creative purposes, now contains more grocery lists than anything else, apathetic…
SAN FRANCISCO — An alarming report released today from the Environmental Defense Fund found that every year, up to 80 percent of vegan leather jackets…
BELLINGHAM, Wash. — A post to the popular classifieds website Craigslist advertising a couch for sale contained several barely-veiled references to the sofa’s rich sexual…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Punk dad Mike Schreiner allegedly bribed a local community college admissions office with billions of dollars worth of exposure to help ensure…
COLUMBUS, Ohio — A Wilco T-shirt mysteriously materialized last week in the closet of local man Steve Rosetti, the latest in a string of possibly…
Dear Scabby: I’m so sick of this cold weather. I wanna move someplace warm but I don’t know where to go, and all of my…
LOS ANGELES — LANDR, the advanced artificial intelligence software for mastering audio, contains an algorithm that can recognize and automatically filter out and disregard any…
FALL CITY, Wash. — Local punk Todd McCloud took the annual purge, allowing humanity to succumb to its most criminal desires for a single day,…
ADDISON, Ill. — Former student Francis “Frankie” Murray received an honorary GED yesterday from the administration of Addison Trail High School, celebrating 20 years since…
ATLANTA — The Weather Channel delighted its fans early this morning by announcing their eagerly awaited 2019 hurricane lineup, setting off a flurry of excitement…
TUCSON, Ariz. — Local woman Estelle Gladstone survived another night in her battle with cancer yesterday, therefore completely blowing the perfect memorial tattoo idea her…
BOSTON — Celtic punk stalwarts Dropkick Murphys settled their debts today after receiving payment for their increased Spotify plays leading up to St. Patrick’s Day,…
LOS ANGELES — Scientists warn that, without decisive and immediate action, California could become the topic of all songs by the year 2050, according to…














