Mental Health Tag Archives

Doug Kolic • September 12, 2026

ATLANTA — A local weak-ass bitch regularly burdens his friends and family with his personal bullshit after a couple of…

Ben Friedman • August 8, 2026

WASHINGTON — A new study regarding mental health conducted and written by Department of Health and Human Services Secretary Robert…

Kevin Coutu • April 24, 2026

NEW YORK — Local therapist Dr. Lauren Mitchell reassured her patient Monday that it is completely normal for a loser…

Dan Kozuh • March 31, 2026

There are two very different reasons a person might find themselves alone at midnight, noise-cancelling headphones on, staring out their…

Ben Friedman • February 12, 2026

TOMS RIVER, N.J. — Local punk Harrison Williams found himself experiencing a new sense of inner peace after fucking up…

Ben Friedman • February 12, 2026

CHICAGO — New mother Kelly Wazowski's night out was saved at the last minute after successfully bringing their newborn child…

Jennifer Donovan • June 3, 2025

WASHINGTON — The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) revealed that ICE agents just aren’t killing themselves, despite being complete…

Charles Bill • May 27, 2025

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump announced plans to cut much needed mental health funds for America’s clown posses, confirmed dope-ass…

Nathan Kamal • May 23, 2025

CHICAGO — Local 42-year-old man Marshall Reese is descending into a nightmarish, unending spiral of increasingly comforting sleepytime teas, unable…

Dom Turek • May 17, 2025

A recent study revealed that only five percent of U.S. adults suffer from a mood disorder, but James Young, a…

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