Amy Currul
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TEL AVIV — IDF soldiers and fellow genocidal maniacs alike were excited to witness Israel’s version of Punxsutawney Phil seeing…
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Rachel Hein
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KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Local emotional support dog Gus is reportedly “at his limit” and has sought his own emotional…
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Stephen Bell
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Fuck! I made a huge mistake at work and now I’m paying for it dearly. My huge mistake? Not making…
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Steve Packosky
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CANTON, Mass. — Observers of the cover art of Dio’s 1983 debut masterpiece “Holy Diver” collectively agreed that the priest…
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Josh Fernandez
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SEATTLE — Local anarchist Tommy Greggors staunchly declined to answer a survey about his experience at OfficeMax, confirmed sources. “I…
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Steve Packosky
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Employers need to be consistently sure that they’re checking every box to ensure the field’s best professionals are not only…
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Steve Packosky
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SAN FRANCISCO — Legendary thrash metal band Metallica announced that Kirk Hammett is to be the new lead guitarist after…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — 19-year-old Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) agent Braden Wakefield found himself running short on reasons for why he…
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Alex Vlahov
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The doctor said this was a first: no one had requested their own colonoscopy footage before. I said this was…
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Jon Wood
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LOS ANGELES — Notorious rapper Kanye West apologized for his past controversial remarks about former President George W. Bush, confirmed…
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