BROWNSVILLE, Texas — SpaceX announced they will no longer be allowing school teachers on their spaceships following the second explosion of a Starship mega rocket…
LOS ANGELES — Controversial rapper Kanye West interrupted the Best Picture winner on stage at the Academy Awards to say the 1935 Nazi propaganda movie…
PROVIDENCE, R.I — Local crust punk Phil “Sponge” Baker is planning on participating in today’s economic blackout by vowing to only use his parents’ credit…
OLYMPIA, Wash. — Local punk Kevin Wilder admitted he was feeling slightly fatigued after he completed a 5K race during a circle pit during a…
It’s been another week in the confusing hell-scape that is life. Just because the world seems to be crumbling at an alarming rate doesn’t mean…
TEL AVIV — IDF soldiers and fellow genocidal maniacs alike were excited to witness Israel’s version of Punxsutawney Phil seeing his shadow Monday morning, which…
SEATTLE — Local anarchist Tommy Greggors staunchly declined to answer a survey about his experience at OfficeMax, confirmed sources. “I simply refuse to let the…
The doctor said this was a first: no one had requested their own colonoscopy footage before. I said this was a request from the deepest…
The judiciary system of the United States of America was established on September 24th, 1789 to protect the rights of our nation’s citizens and it…
The Mandela Effect is the age-old behavioral phenomenon where large swaths of people misremember specific details about a person, event, or cereal brand. For instance,…
The benefits of meal prepping go beyond saving time and money. It also frees up your brain so you can spend less time thinking about…
While you were all picking out flowers, crafting love poems, and filling the deep and gooey pockets of Hershey and Hallmark this week, we were…
So you’re still living paycheck to paycheck despite having a degree and 15+ years of work experience—it’s probably time to look into a side hustle.…
It’s 2025 and after over a decade of unchallenged mainstream hegemony, your hatred of Drake has been vindicated. Look, we all get it. After the…
Before he was a solo artist, Kurt Vile was a founding member of The War on Drugs. The War on Drugs without Kurt went on…