Trump Calls for Boycotting Every Springsteen Song Except the One That Goes “Hey Little Girl Is Your Daddy Home?”
WASHINGTON — President Trump urged his MAGA base to boycott Bruce Springsteen's entire music catalog except for “I’m on Fire” in a Truth Social post early this morning. “Bruce Springsteen, who looks like a DRIED UP PRUNE, has only …
Modern Day Robin Hood? Kalshi Is Giving War Profiteering Back to the Little Guy
Finally! Some justice for the working class! I’ll admit, I had my doubts about sports betting site Kalshi after I lost $3000 in my Hawk-Tuah-Coin-Pump-And-Dump-Scandal-Same-Day-As-Jeff-Probst-Rapping-About-The-Applebees-Bourbon-Burger-On-Survivor-48… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue this tale</a>
So-Called Eric Clapton Fan Safely Protected Against Measles and Rubella
Aging Millennial’s Finger Mustache Tattoo Goes Gray
SEATTLE — A 35-year-old millennial with the once ubiquitous finger mustache tattoo noticed that her ink stache is graying right along with her head hair,… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue this tale</a>
Oh, Like Your Husband Never Engaged in a Bimbofication Fetish While You Had an Affair on a Taxpayer-Funded Luxury Jet – Guest Post by Kristi Noem
Well, don’t we just love to pile on. Is it lonely up there on your pedestals, everybody? Oh, whoopsie, I forgot, I’m a public figure,… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue this tale</a>
Tesla Hides Drive Mode Behind Subscription Paywall
We Sat Down With Cybergoth Icon The Predator
The cybergoth subculture arose in the nineties as a combination of cyberpunk and goth styles, with adherents often seen sporting some combination of a basic,… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue this tale</a>
Music
Report: ‘Dude Looks Like a Lady’ Sucks Too Hard To Worry About How Problematic It Is
BOSTON — While classic rock band Aerosmith’s hit 1987 single “Dude Looks Like a Lady” has not aged well, it ultimately sucks too hard to worry about its problematic nature, sources confirmed. “The world has certainly evolved past the point…
So-Called Eric Clapton Fan Safely Protected Against Measles and Rubella
BRISTOL, Conn. — Rodney Carlson, supposed fan of English rock and blues guitarist-turned-anti-vaxxer Eric Clapton,…
Absolutely Tragic: Chris Jericho Announces Plans To Continue Releasing Music
ODESSA, Fla. — Popular wrestler turned musician Chris Jericho unfortunately announced plans to continue his…
Local Man Owns Inappropriate Number of Guitars for Skill Level
PHOENIX — Local resident Peter Unger has an impressive collection of more than two dozen…
Disappointed Concertgoer Learns Band Only Performs Live Version of Their Songs
BALTIMORE — First-time concertgoer Keith Sulzbach was disappointed to learn that a band he recently…
Featured Posts
The Next Alex Jones? This Parrot Learned To Say “Deep State”
Does anyone want to buy a parrot? He’s a beautiful blue and yellow macaw, very well-behaved, enjoys grapes, and, unfortunately,…
“Our Story” Section of Wedding Website Doubles as Historical Fiction
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Avid readers of TheKnot.com report that a couple’s “Our Story” section on their personal wedding website, where…
Democrats Placated By Decision to Rename Alligator Alcatraz the “Ruth Bader Ginsburg Memorial Detention Facility”
WASHINGTON — Congressional Democrats achieved “yet another satisfying moral victory” against the GOP by convincing their Republican counterparts to rename…
Opinion: I Have a Substack Because I’m an Expert, and I’m an Expert Because I Have a Substack
If you’re looking for true expertise, then look no further than Substack. I know this because I have my own…