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“Arrested Development” Characters Ranked by How Likely They Are to Be QAnon

The motley crew which “Arrested Development’s” main and supporting cast consists of encapsulates a large swathe of the Orange County elite. Pure-blooded Republicans, complaining about taxation, enjoying country club dining, and being viscerally xenophobic towards Latin Americans. QAnon’s main target base has a lot of overlap with the identities and beliefs of the characters on “Arrested Development,” and as such, here are the characters ranked by how likely they are to be a member of QAnon.

52. Bob Loblaw

Bob is a stand-up guy. He is a successful lawyer, who runs his law blog in peace, and his only sin on this Earth is running up accounts receivable for the Bluths who, let’s face it, deserve every bit of legal extortion they encounter in the show. Barry does the same with his billable hours, but at least with Bob, there’s no danger of him joining QAnon.

51. Hel-Loh ‘Annyong’ Bluth

Annyong spent years working as a mole for the SEC to fulfill a lifelong grudge his grandfather held against the Bluths, due to his competing banana stand being shut down and him eventually being deported back to Korea. Crazy American conspiracies hold no sway over Annyong. They wouldn’t accept him at a QAnon meeting anyway.

50. Michael Bluth

Michael Bluth, through some genetic abnormality or otherwise, has remained completely immune to the pitfalls that doom his immediate family. With a head screwed on straight, a surprisingly rare tether to reality, and a shrewd level of business acumen, QAnon will never breach Michael’s sense of reality.

49. George Michael Bluth

George Michael was raised well by his father, similarly not falling into the same traps of his relatives. His internal metronome being so strong somehow renders him immune to any and all forms of propaganda. Wild lies around adrenochrome harvesting are deflected by George Michael’s inbuilt FakeBlock.

48. Lucille Austero

Despite her vertigo in the earlier seasons, and multiple disappearances through the years, Lucille Austero is steadfast in her beliefs. She is a bleeding-heart liberal, opposing the Bluth’s populist ideals, while still helping them in their times of financial hardship. She did originally stand for the Democrats, before her unfortunate disappearance on Cinco de Cuatro, ending her campaign.

47. Lupe

Lupe is too overworked to pay attention to QAnon conspiracies. Lucille works her to the bone, and her constant firing and rehiring ensures that she never gets a chance to rest. The most she knows about QAnon is something that Buster muttered in his sleep once.

46. Marta Estrella

Marta is one of the few people in the show who has common sense, choosing to abandon the whole Bluth family once she realizes how childish the men are. She lives her life as a famous telenovela actress, and raises her children without paying any mind to whatever QAnon is or believes in.

45. Maggie Lizer

Maggie Lizer’s trials and tribulations throughout her time with the Bluths have stopped her from joining QAnon, or taking them seriously. The most she would do is pretend to have been injured at the January 6th insurrection to garner sympathy at a meeting.

44. Mrs. Veal

Ann’s mother is a relatively well-acclimatized Christian liberal. She went along with her husband to one QAnon meeting, and almost filed for divorce immediately after. Local baristas avoid her, since she tells this ten-minute-long story to anyone who will listen.

43. Sally Sitwell

Sally is a sensible person with a strong business acumen. Like Lucille Austero, she is also a steadfast liberal, even taking over her Democrat campaign after her mysterious disappearance. Some say QAnon members in Orange County even have her on a list…

42. Wayne Jarvis

Wayne is a hard worker, and the most consummate of all professionals within the law profession, aside from Bob Loblaw. However, his dedication to the PATRIOT Act, and playing both sides of the Bluth prosecution lends him the most proclivity to QAnon of all the lawyers in “Arrested Development.”

41. Julia Adelaide

Julia Adelaide is shown to love men when they are in a coma, not saying anything, and loathe them as soon as they say a single word to her. QAnon, with perhaps the loudest group of men on the continent, would be completely unappealing to her. She would think that they were all pussies, of the American description.

40. Carl Weathers

Carl Weathers met someone in an airport shuttle talking about how much money they were bringing to their QAnon meeting, and successfully converted them to a similarly predatory, but less politically problematic course of action: his acting classes. “These situations are exactly why you take airport shuttles,” was a piece of his sage advice.

39. Rebel Alley

Rebel is a good-natured woman, whose knowledge of QAnon is vast, but only for a role she played in an Imagine Productions mockumentary surrounding January 6th. She tried method-acting for the first time, earning plaudits for her performance, but also making her realize how she could never be a part of the movement.

38. John Beard

John Beard is a simple man. The only time he ever paid any attention to QAnon was when, on an attachment to Washington DC, he had to report on what the January 6th insurrection “would mean for your weekend,” which he reported as being “not good.” Still better than most Fox News anchors.

37. George Bluth Sr.

George Bluth Sr. is a man who, through having to support his family and making his own company, has a similar sense of reality that Michael does. However, his time in prison seems to have rid George of this, making him more susceptible to QAnon, especially if they have ice cream sandwiches.

36. Mort Meyers

Mort Meyers’ aversion to QAnon is not based on any personality traits of his. His constant hitting on Maeby, despite him being married, makes him feel targeted when they start talking about predators running the world. He’s a philanderous weirdo with no chance of ingratiating himself into QAnon.

35. Warden Gentles

Warden Gentles, despite being a prison warden, is extremely attuned to the ways of the world, writing a screenplay on life in prison (even if it was only performed by children.) He recommends long documentaries on QAnon, and would never join them.

34. Ice

Ice is a jack of all trades: an excellent bounty hunter, going as far as Mexico in pursuit of his targets, and a similarly capable party planner, able to put on a showstopper of a celebration for a reasonable budget. QAnon is not one of those feathers in his cap.

33. Cindi Lightballoon

Cindi is dedicated to two things in life: her job in the federal government as an undercover agent, and George Bluth Sr. She would follow George to many places, but the one place she would stray is QAnon. She loves “Caged Wisdom” too much to ever join QAnon.

32. Dr. Fishman

Dr. Fishman once stumbled across a poster for QAnon on his way to work, but didn’t understand what the Q meant, so he threw the poster in the trash. On a date later that day, he talked about tearing down QAnon, and managed to coast off of that misunderstanding for three months.

31. Steve Holt

You might think that Steve Holt, being a typical jock who peaked in high school, and is now slightly balding and overweight would be the main target for QAnon. With his father being absent from his life, and his experience on the S.A.D. program,  but Steve Holt is a loyal progressive who abhors QAnon.

30. Stan Sitwell

Stan Sitwell is a shrewd businessman, repeatedly besting the Bluths at their own game, including in his resistance to QAnon. If he were to go to a  QAnon meeting, he would likely be laughed out due to his complete hairlessness. The QAnon devotees wouldn’t even know what alopecia was!

29. Nellie Bluth

As the resident “consultant” for the Bluth Company, Nellie Bluth knows what she wants, and exactly how to get it. QAnon’s vitriol towards sex workers and powerful women means that she knows that it isn’t for her, even occasionally going out of the way to report QAnon content she sees online.

28. Tony Wonder

Tony Wonder is a magician, and his ability to bend reality would be scary to anyone in the QAnon movement. He went to a Q rally to try and sell his DVDs, but his W-shaped goatee and hand gesture seemed to be misconstrued by the attendees, causing him to lose his other testicle.

27. Ann Veal

Ann is a long-suffering Christian woman, too bland in her younger years, and too unlucky with men in her older years. Once being so banal as to be forgotten in Mexico, Ann has little chance of joining and being accepted into QAnon. If she went to a meeting, she’d probably be there for three days until someone comes and switches the light back on.

26. Marky Bark

Marky Bark was Lindsay’s activist boyfriend, a profession which stands against the whole idea of QAnon. However, Marky Bark also has a crippling case of face-blindness, meaning that there is a solid chance he stumbles into a QAnon meeting, attempting to follow a Newport Beach socialite he thought to be Lindsay.

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