PHILADELPHIA – A framed show poster for local band Shardcone is a fond reminder of that one night, years ago, when you had sixty dollars.
“I remember that show because I was on a first date with the person I ended up marrying, the sky was beautiful and I actually had a small amount of expendable income in my pocket earmarked for ‘fun,’” you said while comically turning your pockets inside out. “For a brief shining moment, my future was full of possibilities. Then I bought a poster that matches nothing in my home. And for some goddamn reason I went and got it framed, too, for another $60. I can’t imagine doing that now, being so young and reckless and free.”
Your former roommate and finance guru Aubrie Dhillon expressed their dismay at your fiscally irresponsible purchase.
“If you had simply invested that sixty bucks in conservative mutual funds, you’d likely be sitting on nearly twice the amount at the moment. Hell, if you buried the money in a jar and bought the poster now on eBay, you’d have the cold hard cash leftover to throw at your car payment,” said Dhillon. “Instead you thought it was wise to pay full price for a low resolution image depicting a hand in which each finger has a name indecipherably scribbled on it. For some sort of band with the worst name possible. Shardcone? Is that right? That can’t be right.”
Shardcone bassist Linda Leidt, now a night shift supervisor at an Alaskan bitcoin farm, had to be reminded of the show that changed your life.
“Oh, right. Well, at the time I guess it seemed really important to us that our biggest fans–mostly friends and people we worked with at the coffee shop–could get a keepsake, something to remember us by as we thought recording any of our actual music was selling out,” said Leidt “We made posters, postcards, shitty little paper keychains. Anything that the printer at my dad’s firm could handle. If I recall, we spent the proceeds on extra-long grill lighters so our drummer could light his farts on fire without hurting his wrist.”
As of press time, reports indicate that your spouse has been trying to get rid of the poster for the past three years.