JANESVILLE, Wisc. — Tom Howard, a local 39-year-old with a rare Saturday afternoon to himself, was faced with a startling realization that a porn star…
MEQUON, Wisc. — Local Milwaukee Brewers superfan and lifelong edgeman Paul Grazow continually knocks the team’s merchandise out of his own hands due to his…
CINCINNATI — A weekly meetup where a group of friends gather to drink alcohol and enjoy one another’s company was once again spoiled by the…
WILMINGTON, Del. — Office introvert Chandler Pike was cautiously optimistic that his shorter-than-usual haircut would go unnoticed by colleagues, according to sources who overheard him…
CHATTANOOGA, Tenn. — High school math teacher Charles Negley experienced a fleeting moment of euphoria followed by utter disappointment earlier today, after reading news that…
BRANSON, Mo. — Rockabilly band The Soda Jerks dunked all of their instruments in a giant vat of Barbicide following their set last night in…
SAN DIEGO — Local procrastinator Rupa Patel claims she’s never more productive around the house than when she’s on tight deadlines at the office with…
CALHOUN, Ga. — Irate Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene began drafting articles of impeachment against staff at the Applebee’s restaurant when her order didn’t appear in…
PITTSBURGH – Taylor Swift’s recent whirlwind trip to the Steel City caused real estate prices to skyrocket by a shocking margin, locals currently dealing with…
CORTLAND, N.Y. — Local plumber and barfly Randy Kunzelman became borderline irate after a family member told him most of the horrific footage featured in…
PATCHOGUE, N.Y. — Local comedy nerd Robert Korey abandoned his girlfriend Jessica Linney at a party to quote one-liners from legendary stand up Mitch Hedberg…
NEW YORK – Employees of boutique consulting firm PayIt were shocked today when Bret Michaels showed up demanding an interview in response to their job…
PHILADELPHIA — Problematic punk Tom “Bigfoot” LaTucci was officially exiled from the local scene by the Punk Elder Tribunal this morning and banished to the…
CUMBERLAND, Md. — Self-described “trivia nut” Nick Fostenbury believed he correctly identified the four members of the folk-rock band Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young at…
NEW YORK — New research funded by Fortune 500 CEOs revealed that improving work-life balance will decrease the size of your schlong, which prompted many…