Jennifer Donovan
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REVERE, Mass. — Local porn addict AJ Robkowski reportedly watched so much AI porn that he no longer finds real-life…
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Joe Rumrill
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GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Touring Australian egg-punk band PENCIL PILE were heard to be dropping major hints that they’d like…
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Ben Sobieck
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PORTLAND, Ore. — Noted music scene advocate Sean Burton was fatally shot in an incident identical to a prediction made…
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Matt Husser
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BOISE, Idaho — One grandpa's harrowing tale of “walking to school uphill both ways” failed to land with his 15-year-old…
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Tim Sheard
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LOS ANGELES — Well-known idiot Donald Robertson was beside himself with amazement when ChatGPT was able to produce an unexceptional…
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Tim Graham
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BURLINGTON, Mass. — ICE agent Wayne Almeida attempted to pick up women at a local bar by showing off his…
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Zachary Wolf
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GRAND JUNCTION, Colo. — The entire population of nearby Mesa Springs was killed after a roundabout was installed in their…
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Zachary Wolf
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JUPITER, Fla. — A new feature in your vehicle’s GPS now measures distance in the time it would take you…
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Charles Bill
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CHICAGO — The Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists shocked the world today with an announcement that their most chill scientist…
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Steve Packosky
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PITTSBURGH — A regular intake of lime wedges served with his favorite beer at local dive bar The Rock Room…
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